I don't know how to start this. The truth is husband and wife had an argument last night just before they went to sleep. And what's the fuzz all about? About husband older sister where they currently live. Wife wants to live separately in their own. Not now, but hopefully in the future. She does not want to be in the same roof forever with her sister-in-law whose attitude is very rude. But husband strongly disagree with it. He wants to be with his sister like forever. He even said that wife wants him to be away from all his siblings. He said that what wife wants is to make him live away from only few of his siblings. He said that wife don't like to socialize with his sister, and just want her sister to be socialize with wife. Wife only wanted to live like a real family since she already married his husband and soon they will be having a child. But husband wants to live his sister whom wife and his sister are not in good terms. Wife is now thinking that husband cannot live without his sister. Even with decision making he always consult with his sister. And with this wife is silently and slowly moving away from husband. Wife did not marry husband and his sister. If this will continue, wife might decide to move away from them all. From the siblings. If husband cannot stand on his own, wife will make a way to stand on her own, together with her child. God will help her....

GooD News!!!!

It's almost a month since I last post here. Right now, we are actually living in my sister-in-law's newly bought house. We moved in here last May 23, 2009. That day was a very tiring day for me.

Anyway, as my title of this blog, GOOD NEWS... it's because, I might be a soon-to-be mom!!!. I have already missed my period since May 22. And its been 2 weeks since then that I still don't have my period. Beside, sometimes I feel dizzy and nauseated, and most of the time I feel sleepy... I always get tired. I also noticed that my boobs are a little bit swollen. And my tummy is quiet big, not as big like before. When I told this thing to my husband, he was very happy to know! We even start calling each other, Daddy and Mommy.. hehehe... And we start formulating names again.. hehe... we want the best name for our soon to be kids..

But most importantly, as early as now, or even before we decided to have a kids, we are always praying for our kids to be healthy. I am also praying that my pregnancy stage will be as easy like I am not pregnant at all. And my delivery birth will be like I am pooping. No hassle, less pain, and will be in normal delivery. So, at the first week of my first delayed menstruation, I told hubby that when I am really pregnant, we/I need to swim, atleast 30mins to 1 hour a day , and twice a week. then the other 30 mins will be for brisk walking here at the park in our community. It is in preparation for my delivery birth.. hehehe.. I even search and read forums, issues and other pregnancy matters to the internet about my condition. As early as now, I want the best for our baby... Though we haven't visit an obegyne yet, but we will sure do this week. I need to see one and undergo check-up for the sake of my baby inside my womb and myself as well.

I am so excited to tell the goodnews to my Inay and all my siblings and friends. But since we haven't confirmed it yet to the Doctor, I still need to be patient and wait atleast 3 to 4 days to spread the goodnews.. hehe, I know they will all be happy for me, for my hubby and for our baby! I can see all the smiles in their faces.. hehehe...

I would like to share what happened yesterday. I felt the first nauseated and dizzynezz, maybe because of my situation. At first my vision got blurred, wherever I look, there's always a shining and blurry things. I can't clearly see what I am looking. Then hubby, advised me to closed my eyes for atleast 30 mins which I did, then when I opened my eyes, my sight was back to normal. It was one of the weirdest thing that happened to me. Then the second one was when I was helping hubby in the preparation of cooking sopas, I really felt dizzy, and my head was aching, my stomach was upset, It seems that I was gonna puke and poop at the same time. So I stopped what I was doing and hurridly run upstaire telling hubby that really don't feel good. I just lay at our bed, nearly crying for the undescribable feeling. I just layed there for about an hour.. then I stand up and decided that I need to help hubby in the kitchen, but still my condition is not getting any good. So I decided to stay at bed once more, and eventually fell asleep. Hubby just woke me up to have a soup in my stomach. I did not even noticed him entered the room. He just smiled at me and with all His might, try to comfort me, to atleast make my condition feel good. Iloveyou beh.... And after I think 3 or 4 hours, my condition got even better. Thank you Lord for my loving and caring husband. Thank you more for our baby...

Right now, whenever I am not feeling well, I always talk to my baby silently to be healthy always and also help mommy to feel well for him/her... And he/she kindly obeyed me.. what a loving and obedient baby.. love you very much our dear baby!!!! muah muah muah!

I am patiently waiting for the time that I can finally spread to the world about your existence!.. "Mommy, just wait a little bit more... " hehehe.. I will honey! hehehe "love you mommy!" and I love you more baby...

Today, my sister-in-law's co-nurse visited her and her house, when they saw me, they asked me how old am I, and I told them, I am already 28. Then she told me, I don't look 28, I looked even younger at my age.. hehe... I know. I will blossom.. I will look beautiful and gorgeous.. hehehe... its for my baby and I... and also for Daddy! "Daddy, thank you and love you for taking good care of Mommy and I..."

One more thing, today I feel good all day. Except for the fact that I always sleep.. hehe, which makes me feel good some more. hehehe...

love,
S.M.R.

wondering

Early this morning, i went to the gym and exercised a little. I used the threadmill and brisk walked for about 40 mins with a speed of 2.5 to 3.5. I started in a speed of 2 for 5 mins until I reached 3.5 speed and briskwalked for about 20mins. After that I did the lifting for the arms and breast with a count of 1 to 10. Then I used the machine for legs. The last machine I used was the stepper, which I used for only 2 mins. When I stopped, my heart was pounding very fast, then a minute later, I got dizzy, my vision got blurred, and my whole body was feeling numb. At that time, I knew I will gonna puked. With my body not feeling well, I ran to the bathroom and when I reached the toilet bowl, I vomitted. I really felt weak... My whole body was sweating with cold water and trembling at the same time. Don't know why it happened to me. It was the second time since I came here in America. I am just thinking maybe it happened because I lacked in exercise. What I am doing here are just eating, sleeping, dish washing, washing the clothes and cooking. Plus the fact that I seldom laugh here... Maybe my heart is a little sad... Because, first, my husband always shout at me, even to the petty things or small things he will become angry and shout at me, which he will never do to his sister. 2nd, to the fact that I really don't want to live here... sigh.. my husband really don't understand me at all. so what i am doing is I do all the understanding for him.

I wish he will love me so much. He will wish for my happiness. And he will respect me. How I wish he will decide for our own sake and make decision not based from his sister. How I wish...

S.M.R.

Boredom

hay... I do feel sad since yesterday... I wanna go back home in the Philippines. Nasasakal n ako d2!. I want my old life back. I want to be the happy person as I was before. I want a job that can support all my needs and wants. I want job with salary so I can buy all the things I want to give to all my siblings without relying to my husband's money. And I want my own house! I don't want being nagged by my husband in front of her sister! This past few days he always raised his voice to me. The most things I hate doing to me and yet he always do that. I can easily accept that if I am the only one hearing those high voice but he did it that can be heard by her sister. And I really feel humiliated!. I don't know, since we moved here with her sister, I feel that I am not being respected by him at all. I feel that all I need to do is to serve and please him since he is the one working. He is the one making income for us to be able to eat. To live. Right now, I feel depressed of what is happening to me. I know he may be alright now because he never anticipate what I am going to feel or what I am going through right now. He never ask if I am ok. He don't even say sorry for the things he know that can hurt my feelings. It seems that my feeling for him is fading. I am hurting, I am enduring all this things he is doing to me. I am always praying to God to give me enough strength to carry all this test, to have faith to HIM that I can surpass all this things. Because, I am slowly giving up. I am bleeding inside. I am not happy anymore. I am not...

Lord God, please help me overcome all this things.. I cannot do this alone. I need your guidance... I need you Oh Lord.. please help me to cheer up and ignore what my husband did to me that make me feel this way. Please Lord God help me to be strong all this time. Please Lord God.

S.M.R.

Good News good news..

Hello there!

It's my first blog here in my sister-in-law's apartment. Hubby and I moved here last April 1. It's been 2 weeks since then. I had a difficult adjustment time. At first I really don't want to live here, what I want is for us to rent our own apartment like we did in Tempe. But because of some financial issue, Hubby decided to live here together with her sister for us all to save money and all the expenses. And so, we are here now, living peacefully together.

During the first week of our stay here, it's kinda awkward because, Hubby and I don't have our own room, so when, sister-in-law and her flatmate does not have duty, we will be sleeping in the living room. And when they have duty or sister-in-law have duty, we will be sleeping in her room. It's just that moving here and there were a little bit tough. And when they are both here, during the morning, they are sleeping, and during the night, they are awake. I cannot do the laundry during the morning because of that reason. And I am not allowed to make loud sound or play the radio loudly. The whole day will be like a lullaby for me. It will lull me to sleep.

However, today, we have our own room now. The master's bedroom. Her roommate went back for a 7-week vacation to the Philippines. And with that, I can watch movies, play music without using earphone! hehe.. It's kinda relief. We even have our own bathroom and walk-in closet. It makes things for us easier. Thank you Lord.

Today, when I woke up, I went to the bathroom to pee. Then checked my laptop to find out it's battery was dead. So I picked my laptop and brought in the kitchen to have it charged while I was preparing Hubby's breakfast and sandwich for lunch. While cooking, I was checking my mail and chikka simultaneously, there goes the good news!. Ms Weng told me that she is already pregnant! I am so happy about that!, then popped another message from Malu, another goodNews, Mia is also pregnant!... Hubby and I are very happy to hear about that goodnews...
hopefully, in the coming months, I'm gonna tell them that I too is pregnant! hehehe..

I am overwhelmed with GoodNews. Another GoodNews!, Hubby's H1B visa is already approved! it means we can stay here for another 3 more years without worry about our status. And I can change my visa as well and with God's Grace and Mercy, I will be employed this year once my visa changed. I will leave all this things in God's Almighty Hands. The pregancy issue and my visa and work.. I know there are a lot of Good things God prepared for us. And with that I thank you Lord God...

Thank you Lord for all the Good News...

Love,
S.M.R.

March 30, Last night here in B202 Sierra vista tempe

yes, tonight would be our last night here in our first rented apartment. I packed almost all of our things the whole day so we can bring them all in Symphony. Hubby will take a whole day leave tomorrow for our complete move-out. The feeling is kinda subtle. Soon, we will face new life together with my sister-in-law. God help us always.

I also received a news about the processing of my visa here. And up to this very moment I am not sure about the exact status of my application. I may be leaving US for a while and come back to my homeland and apply to US embassy there for my visa or stay and apply here. Don't really know yet. With coming home in mind, I figure out already what am I going when I return to my homeland. My first option is to continue my studies and have a Bachelor's degree in Computer Engineering or in Electronic Communication Engineering or in Accountancy. If I am going home, I might take-up one of this course. If God will permit, I also want to have a part-time job while studying so I can have extra income. The desire of studying and getting a Bachelor's degree makes me eager to pursue it more and more. But if my visa will be processing here, then I will stay here and be with my husband until I can finally land a job and be happy as always!

May the Good Lord grant my heart's desire.. I know He will lead me to a more secure and perfect things not only for me but to all my family... I will leave all of this into His Hand.

Just want to share my thoughts for today.

Love ,
S.M.R.

Thank you our dear home/apartment for 6 months

We will be moving back to my sister-in-law's apartment by the end of this month. Our contract for our apartment will be ending on the last Day of March and so with our stay here. It's been 6 months since we moved in here and I can say that Hubby and I had grown into a much loving couple. We'd experienced laughter, cry, fighting and also misunderstanding. But, despite all of that, we can say that life is really beautiful. I learn how to cry, voice out my opinion and feelings, I also learn how to be patience, how to communicate, learn how to understand the situation, learn how to understand more my husband's work, his studies, his attitude and I learn to embrace our life as a couple. I also learn how to value more our families and friends.

April 1, we will be leaving in his sister's apartment until we can move in to her new home. I am praying that God will continue his Blessings and Guidance as we move to a new place, get along with new people and learn to love all the people around us. I am praying that as a couple we can share love to others. I am praying that God will nurture us more with His majestic Hand of wisdom, good Health and good career. I am praying that God will bless us with a Good Family when the right time comes for us to have a loving, healthy, cute and smart children.

God we entrust all of our life to you. May you continue to Guide us as always...

Till my next update...

GodBless